Craig - I'm not a teacher, so my posting can only be one of support.  However, my wife wanted to be a math teacher when she got out of college, and she went straight from college to teach to (get this!) an inner-city school, Catholic, in downtown Miami.  Many of the same issues came up - the kids were physically threatening; disrespectful; came from socio-economic backgrounds where ANY adult authority is automatically to be challenged - and they had absolutely no interest in being there.  You might think that a Catholic school would have the discipline thing licked, right?  Not so.  No support from the administration; blame all around to everyone and everything EXCEPT where it lay - the background these kids came from.  She got out at the end of the year, a wreck, and went to work for the Department of Defense, from which she just retired after 34 years' service, having worked for the Army, the Air Force, and the Navy - and was EXTREMELY successful with that career path into computers and the personnel world.  The truth of the matter is that far too many inner-city schools are nothing more than holding patterns until these kids turn 16 - and then they can legally go without another thought.  While I haven't observed your situation, it's clear that you have walked into the classic buzzsaw - AND your fellow teachers are not telling you the truth - or if they are, they're not sharing their methods - and they want you gone as well, because what they've told you is frankly a bunch of garbage, in my humble opinion.  You've already reported to us that your class is a "dumping ground" for all the kids who don't get what they wanted in the way of an elective - what's to be expected except utter and complete resentment?  Furthermore, these kids come from backgrounds and live in circumstances where NOTHING is self-disciplined, much less other-than-self-disciplined.  They probably are latchkey kids for the most part, "responsible" for their own conduct and behavior after school, and probably don't see Mom and Dad until 8:00 or 9:00 or 10:00 o'clock at night, if then - because they're working two and three jobs just to keep things going.

 

Stop beating yourself up.  You have high expectations of yourself, and for the most part in your career you've met them.  This is a warning, if the other inner-city school hadn't been - if you want to continue teaching, avoid this circumstance.  You are NOT a failure; you are someone who has confronted an irresolvable situation, and there is no solution in your grasp - and that's not your fault.  The solution starts at home - and it's not happening.  It continues from the management of the administration - and that's not happened, obviously.   The next seven weeks will be hell, I agree; do your best; don't rage against the circumstances because the only consequence will be you going to the place where men in white coats (and we're NOT talking waiters!) work every day.  You have, I suspect, far too much to offer the world of music and kids to put yourself into this situation again - and yet, you report to us that you are, except at the elementary level.  It may be time to look for another job in another, less exciting circumstance.  Maybe it'll pay less (I doubt it), but at least you'll keep your sanity - and your dedication both to teaching and to your art.

 

Incidentally, the comment about "I even tell them that I care about them" is perhaps the most poignant thing about your posting - the problem is, nothing around these kids gives them any confidence any adult does.  No matter how much the discipline you want to instill in them as a necessity to being successful in music and in life is offered and tried, they don't believe it - and don't want to.  Remember, at the age these kids are, it's nothing BUT rebellion against all adult authority - and the only thing that counts is the good opinion of the other kids in their "gang" - whether that's a real one or just the ever-shifting groupings.

 

What little good it'll do, you have my constant thoughts and prayers.

 

Ron

Craig,

 

Your situation is highly complex, as I'm sure you know, and you are NOT a horrible teacher! Writing up an online reply for you would take a huge amount of time, so I'd like to talk with you one-to-one by phone about your situation (or via Skype, if you have that free video-call technology). If you would be willing to send me a private email message on ChoralNet that includes a telephone number I could reach you at, and some days/times that would be convenient for you to have a phone conversation, I'll call you and we can do some talking that, in my opinion, may be very helpful to you. If you wish, you can use my personal/private email address to communicate with me--vlthur44(a)gmail.com. Just so you know, I can be available tomorrow/Saturday 4/20/13 after about 4PM (Central time), or all day Sunday 4/21/13.

 

Be courageous!

Leon

 

 

 

Craig -

I am a five-year teacher, so you may wish to take what I submit here with a grain of salt -- but I really do want to help, so I'll try. 

 

The things that hit me in your story are the focus of the main points and the tactics involved.  I'll try to explain: 

 

Your post is about discipline, starting right from the title.  Your tactics and reactions are all about discipline, and finding more effective ways to enact it.  But take a moment and think about your best experiences in the classroom -- or in education -- and analyze what was great about them.  I'll bet they had little to do with discipline and much to do with engagement, discovery and working together to create something great. 

 

All well and good you say -- but these kids don't want to be engaged, in fact they're fighting it.  Okay, so what does interest them? 

 

I've had a bit of success working with problem kids.  My main teachable is wood shop (although I conduct our high school choir and do various other musical things around the school too) and that is another famous "dumping ground".  I get kids who simply don't want to be in school, who don't "get" it, who have trouble fitting in -- and who often oppose authority in any way open to them.  I find that to really get them engaged you need a hook -- you have to find something that they relate to, that they want to be a part of.  

 

It will take something different to get them into the game.  What music do they listen to?  Who are their favourite singers?    Do they dance?  What would be the coolest musical thing they could do?  Beatboxing?  Rap?  Drumming?  This may be outside your comfort zone -- but if they want to do things like this, it would be okay to confess that you will be learning too, to my mind.  Let them see that music isn't a thing to oppress them with but a thing that people learn about together.  It might not be music at the high school level as you see it, but it might open a door -- and that would be an improvement right now. 

 

It just seems to me that by staying on the subject of discipline you may be focussing on the wrong part of the question.  I'm a firm believer in the maxim "what you pay attention to grows".  Pay attention to how bad everything is, it will get worse.  Try to shift to the good stuff -- the good stuff might start growing. 

 

Will you salvage this year?  Maybe not -- it's hard when a class becomes deeply poisonous.  But even if you find some small thing that works, it will be a start for next year. 

 

Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is considered a sign of insanity -- it's time for a radical change of approach.  I think you've got to find a path to these kids -- anything that works.  Good luck in the search for that path!

Best wishes

Doug

Hi, Craig,

 

I've had a couple of tough urban teaching assignments, and to be really honest about it, I think a lot of my successes with these kids came from the adapting I had to do, not from making them conform to my ideas about what choir or a general music class should be.  I used a lot of team-based games, even in choir, especially if it was a dumping ground choir, and sometimes I ditched the entire choir idea and went with World Drumming (I used buckets, chairs, and rhythm sticks) or general music games.  Believe me when I tell you I have lived Dangerous Minds and Sister Act 2.  I will admit that I'm a bit of a chameleon in that I have spent my entire life learning how to adjust to new situations and fit in and  I believe this ability to adapt is now a part of my personality make up.  I have watched really excellent teachers not make it in the urban school setting, and it's no reflection on their talent and ability to teach.  It simply means they couldn't make a personal connection with these kids.  Many students and their parents who live in poverty distrust the educational system and tend to not trust the teacher until it's been proven that you really care about that kid as a person (saying it is not enough, your actions have to match it, but they have to be actions that are meaningful to them).  I don't believe that every teacher has that intrinsic ability to connect with every type of kid; that is the main problem for many teachers who work in those tough settings, and they often burn out of the profession. 

 

Having said all that, when the other teachers tell you that they don't have any problems with those kids, inferring it's all you, well, that's a load of you-know-what.  Kids don't magically become monsters in one class and then act angelic in others.  They may behave better in the other classes because they've connected with that teacher, but there's no way they aren't challenging.  I do have a guess about what happened in the beginning of the year, but it's only a guess, so if I'm wrong, toss it out:  It's my guess that you started the year with your standard discipline plan in which you would use "the look," give warnings in front of the class, and if someone got out of line, you gave the instructions for the disciplinary action ("Go to Time Out," "Go sit on the side and rethink your choices," "Go to the office,", etc.)  If this is true, and you enacted a discipline plan in which you called kids out in front of their peers, I would like to suggest a completely opposite, more personal approach in the future.   ALL discipline takes place as a quiet conversation with the kid pulled aside so the group won't take sides and won't develop a collective "us versus her/him" mentality, and make it personal first.  They absolutely must be separated out from their gang.  Example:  "JoShawn, you seem to be having difficulty today.  You seem really angry and out of sorts.  What's going on?"   Another example, after you've started to establish a connection with the kid:  "Hey, JoShawn, I'm feeling really disrespected today (respect is HUGE with kids), because you're talking out and interrupting me.  What's going on with that?" Allow for a response, even if it's one you don't want or they are disrespectfu (in short, you are letting them be HEARD), and then:  "Well, regardless of how you feel about me or my class, I need you to rethink your choices before we have a situation in which we have a big conflict.  I'd prefer to not have it become a bigger problem, but ultimately it's your choice.  I'm going to have you sit off to the side to rethink your choices, and then I'd like you to rejoin the group if you feel you can contribute in a positive way.  If you don't think you can contribute in a positive way, I'd like you to stay seated on the sidelines because I don't want to see you get yourself into trouble."  These are just ideas, of course.  I make it up as I go along depending on the kid and what is happening.  No, it doesn't get solved instantly or even in a few days.  This is an on-going process that never ends.  All discipline is personal and not in front of the group.  It also must be emotion-free and totally matter-of-fact.  You can't be angered because it hands the power over to them and they are looking for a response.  Get a tennis racket and beat your pillow up at home, go work out, but don't give anything away emotionally in front of the kids when they are trying to get a response.  Give them nothing.  They may certainly make those choices, but we all have to learn that when you make poor choices there will be a consequence of some kind.  As an aside, I've got to tell you (keep in mind that I'm a complete nutcase), that if my students started bumping their chairs or making some kind of whistle, I'd probably plop myself into a chair and immediately start doing some kind of rhythm to pair up with what they're doing (making an improv percussion band) with a big grin on my face.  By turning it into something musical and potentially humorous as well, I would take away their effort to rattle me and turn it right back onto them.  I don't think that's quite the response they'd be looking for, and I'm fairly sure it would grab the interest or the beginning of some respect from a couple of kids.

 

 

Anyway, I believe the basic, root issue here is connection.  You need to find some way to connect with them on a personal level if you can.  Maybe you can't; maybe you are one of those really talented teachers that just can't make a connection with these kids, but can easily make connections with kids in other settings.  You'll have to look inside yourself and own whatever kind of teacher you are.  If you feel that you are better suited somewhere else, then go do that.  The fact that you care so deeply about this suggests that you are probably a quite good teacher.  There's no shame in saying that you just weren't suited to teaching in that setting.  Hey, I taught elementary, but I had to move away from it because my personality just doesn't connect as well with those kids.  I liked them well enough, but I didn't LOVE them.  It sounds to me like you haven't learned to love the kids you have right now, and I'm guessing they know that which is why they've made it their collectively personal mission to make you as miserable as possible.  Yes, it's a campaign, and my guess is that you can't salvage this year. 

 

You've said that you're moving to elementary next year, still within the urban setting.  I disagree with the idea that they will be exactly like the kids in your current middle school; they can still be malleable at this point.  If you believe that you have the ability to make a connection with urban kids, then elementary is a great place to start working on the new discipline.  Study up on Ruby Payne's teaching methods and use them.  Greet kids at the door and shake their hands or  high-five them to welcome them to your class, and try to use their names when you do.  Always meet them at the door to say hi, and walk them out the door to say goodbye.  For elementary, use the time out chair and let kids know that when they go to time out they should take a few deep breaths to calm down and then start to think about what they did that got them there (and make sure that after their class has left you ask them that question before you leave and let them know that tomorrow (or the next session) is a fresh start and you're looking forward to seeing them again next time and you just know you're going to have a great lesson with them.  Learn their names as fast as you can so they know that you KNOW them.  When you meet with parents, the first thing you should say is how much you really enjoy their child (find something!) and how much you want him/her to be successful.  Plan to accommodate all students in your class, not just special ed kids, by reading instructions out loud (have them follow along as you read the directions by having their finger follow the words), providing process sheets for various tasks (process sheet on the steps to naming the line and spaces on the staff, process sheet on how to find "do.").  Use a floor staff so they can kinesthetically connect with the staff.  Help them find success by using these methods and play a lot of games so they really want to come to music.  As soon as you have them hooked and you make those connections, your reputation will be set and everything will settle down.

 

If you feel that you can't connect to these elementary kids, then own it and take no shame in deciding that you prefer to work with kids with whom you can connect.  Each of us has a gift.  Perhaps your teaching skills belong in a setting that is more comfortable for you so that you can better connect with the kids.  It sounds like you have been quite excellent in other settings.

 

Of course, you  have to get through the rest of this year.  It's probably not something that can be fixed this late in the year, so mentally and emotionally let it go, survive the next seven weeks, and walk away without a backwards glance.  As you mentally let it go, perhaps you can reassert your sense of humor and when they pull these stunts, make some kind of joke about it or turn it around on them in a funny way so that they can see they aren't getting to you any more--you're done.

 

Oh, and lose the candy.  They think it's a bribe, and it's not working anyway.  Save the money and take yourself out to dinner, a NICE one.  You really deserve it.  If they ask what happened to the candy, you can be honest and tell them that since they didn't seem to appreciate it, you used the money to go out to dinner instead and thank them for the nice dinner.  :-)

 

 

Hi Craig,

     Your story sounds very familiar, so maybe I can help a little.  I came from a fairly middle class to affluent school (although there was a tiny sprinkling of poverty thrown in) to the school I'm in now, which is much like you've described.  I've made the statement "Nothing I did in my other school works" many times, so I know what it's like to start from Square One.  And that's exactly where you are right now.

     First and foremost, your kids don't trust anyone.  I think we can't even imagine what some of their home lives are like.  They have to know two things:  That they can trust you and that you care.  Unfortunately, when we go about classroom management with frustration and anger, their first thought is "See, I knew he/she didn't care."  (At least that's what THEY perceive).  The hardest thing I ever did was also the best.  When the talking/behavior/rudeness/etc. started, I simply stopped and waited.  Sometimes it seemed like hours, but I refused to let my emotions be sucked in.  What they wanted more than anything was a response/explosion from me (because it would prove what they thought - that I was the enemy), and when I stopped giving them one, things improved.  I simply waited until the noise stopped, then I said thank you, and we went on.  You can't "call out" these kids.  They don't see it as discipline.  They see it as a personal attack and they will come back fighting and kicking all the more.  Sometimes at the beginning it seemed like all we did was stop and wait.  It's worth it though.  They must see absolutely no emotion from you.  No buttons pushed.

     Second, you have to reach them where they are musically, and if that's singing nothing but hip hop (school appropriate) then so be it.  There are worlds of difference between the choir we invision and where they really are. Give them something to sing that they can love and feel good about.

     Now, I bet you're feeling very skeptical at this point.  I was in your position in the Fall of 2010.  I was completely overwhelmed with the reception I got from these kids, but I started doing what I said above just a few weeks into school.  My boys choir (17) refused to sing for me at all individually so I could voice them, so I just had to assign parts based on their speaking voices.  I know these kids seem so hardcore, but in reality they are extremely fragile.  I disagree with the "you weren't strict enough in the beginning".  Choir is not like any other class.  Singing makes you feel vulnerable anyway, and these kiddos are already like scared animals (the more scared you are the harder you're going to fight).  I'm now finishing my 3rd year here.  Both my UIL choirs did very well - not quite sweeps yet (girls 1 2 2 and guys 2 2 2) but it was VERY close.  It has taken 3 years to build the standards I want, and for the kids to love and respect me.  All the positive things you're doing are good.  I just think that all the conflict in the room has led to more frustration on your part and distrust from the kids.  One statement in your original post caught my eye: "The class will not shut up after I ask them 5 times to get quiet."  Only ask once.  Then the get quiet and wait comes into play.  Trust me.  There will be at least one kid who will back you up and start telling the others to get quiet.  Soon there will be more.  Then finally when that one yahoo refuses to hush, the whole class will say to him in unison "SHUT UP!"  I know it shouldn't be this way, but you have to prove yourself to these kids.  They have to see that you aren't going to jump down their throats.  They have to see that you won't lose your cool.  You will simply quietly and respectfully wait until they're willing to move forward with you.  (Sidenote:  I was shaking in my boots the first few times I did this, but I stood my ground.)  I will tell you though, that it's worth the struggle!!!  I absolutely love these kids and they know that I will not tolerate ANY behavior issues in my classroom, but that they can trust me to always deal with them fairly and respectfully.

     At this point, I would just suggest a clean slate.  Have a day to talk things out, and acknowledge that neither you nor they are happy with the way things have been.  Tell them that you will no longer ask more than once.  Be very clear (specifics) about what you expect, and promise them that they can expect no more escalation of emotion or frustration from you.  Then know that they WILL test you.  Then when they do, follow through with what you promised.  And on the same day they test you, make sure you have their favorite song ready to go and let them sing what they love.

     The other thing in your post that hurts my heart is the person who told you to expect nothing better from the elementary kids next year because they're the "same kind of kids".  That actually made me angry. Don't listen to whoever is telling you those things.   "Those" kinds of kids need our love and protection all the more, because they don't get it anywhere else.

     All the classroom management tricks in the world don't mean squat with our kids until they know they can trust us at the most basic level.  That means being completely detached emotionally from the BEHAVIOR (not the kid) that's going on.  It's imperative that you respond calmly, without raising your voice, and then you wait.  They truly are like a scared animal, and a scared animal will fight and scratch and scream.  Once you've gained their trust though, those kids will have your back.

     It has taken three years, but my days are filled with high fives, hugs, and beautiful music.  It's worth the wait and the struggle.  Remember, three years ago I was EXACTLY where you are right now.  Start over with them.  Apologize.  Yes, apologize.  (I did many times that first year, even though technically I wasn't wrong.  You're dealing with a much more primal leval of give and take and trust though, than the "normal" kids we've been used to. )Then give them a chance.  I don't think they'll disappoint you.

 

Wishing you the best.

Kathie Brooks

   

I recommend you order and read the book  Love and logic.  It gives concrete ways to deal with behavior issues without anger  but with empathy.  You may have to simplify your songs so you can do the relationship building that is necessary to move forward.  Offer solo parts to those who can manage it and have the others sing the repetitive refrains to songs.  Let them sing what they already know fom the media.  Use your time to repair the relationships.  We can't move forward until those relationships improve.  Perhaps your biggest problem kids can conduct  or dance something that they feel proud and ready to do.  Kathie brooks has many valuabe suggestions.   Essentially we are both saying the music has to come after the trust returns.   Tom Carter In Choral charisma  has games and other trust building exercises.  Some are on line.   also show youtube videos as rewards for good work.  They can select a few and you can preview to be sure they are appropriate for school.  Recent choralnet posts have a clip of very cool guys singing the national anthem at a sports event.  Very cool.  There are other great short clips that are easily found on youtube.  Kds like these.   Good luck

Craig,

All the responses have given valuable insights!

I have been in similar situations.  [ I recently taught in one community where  the incarcerated criminals were released; just a few years prior it had been a model of academic and arts acheivement.] I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with this.  I admire your strength, resolve, and faith to stick with it, and to care enough about the last few weeks to write us again.

And yet, as it says in the 4th verse of "How Firm a Foundation", "When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, my grace...thy supply...flame shall not hurt thee...thy dross to consume and thy gold to refine"... possibly (?) you are having some of your "dross" [less-precious metal] burned off.  The students are, too.   (Perhaps, like the gold, you will all "shine brighter" in the end, but I think that might be less-important than the possibilities of the moment.) You, and they, are learning how to deal with folks from different backgrounds with different expectations, and different feelings.  They are reacting on a different, possibly more instinctive level.  (The "scared animal" image that Kathie alluded to is very apt.  Some of them may feel like caged/abused animals.)

Coming from a 2-parent home where love and respect were emphasized [note the order :) ],  I only imagined what some of these young people go through.  I thought, "Food shortage.  Not-so-nice clothes.  Self-esteem issues.  Grammar/social manners disadvantage.  No piano lessons.  Never taken to concerts."  I finally got a more realistic picture when I discussed one young lady's constant disrespect and obstinance with her Sp. Ed. teacher, who shared with me, "She has experienced what no young girl should."  Since that time, I learned that some -  too many - in this community are sold as sex slaves, and their mothers are prostitutes.   In these communities the boys are often pressured to act as agents ("pi--ps") because it is perceived that they can connect with the "attractive" girls.  How would we feel if we were faced with the choice of selling our sister, or dying at gunpoint?  How would we feel if we were molested by our mother's boyfriend, and threatened with our life, should we tell?  I am not trying to be over-dramatic, or a "bleeding-heart liberal" ;) or have you feel sorry unnecessarily, or be too soft on your students.  Of course, they still need to learn to respect.  But I have learned through www.streetgrace.org that these statistics are much truer, and more pervasive, than many of us might think.  Drugs can cause similar patterns and issues.  Poverty, and lack of education about relational issues,  can cause excessive stress in the home, including violence/battering.

Much of this, for these youngsters, is about control.  [For one example: Try using your favorite search-engine for the words "rape" and "control".] 

Much of what you report is common in an M.S. classroom - the pointed, showy, disrespect, the group ganging - can happen even in a wealthy/educated community, depending on other factors.

It is not your fault  that they are behaving this way.  You did nothing to "deserve this".

However, what might God be teaching us here?  Are you in a unique position for ministry - like Esther - "for such a time as this?"

If these youngsters [in their lives outside of your classroom] are constantly told when to rise, what to eat, wear, possibly called names like "stupid" and worse, told that they are good-for-nothing/will amount to nothing and their virginity/sexual privacy is controlled by someone bigger than they are, you can see why they have an immense amount of anger/stored rebellion.  Maybe they hoped Chorus/Music was one place where they would have some choices, could sing out some of their issues....and they find a teacher who has a different agenda..?  This does not mean that you let them control you, or your classroom.  It might, however, give you some thoughts as to the attitude/level of gentleness/understanding you wish to communicate with.  One comment that, to me,  stood out in your post is "which would have had my other kids cowering in the corner, begging for mercy."  Based on your other comments, I don't think you are a person who likes control for control's sake.  I don't think you want to be a "control freak", but these students are pushing your buttons so rapidly ...trying to make you into one.  Maybe try speaking to them with the gentleness and understanding you would demonstrate for a 4-year-old, [they just might have enough scars to still be that vulnerable] , but with language and expectations for a reasonably-mature teen.   Remember that they often say the opposite of what they feel deep inside.  (Protects that all-important group-esteem. ) As Bea says in the play "Up the Down Staircase" (one of the first pieces of literature taking an  honest look at inner-city education issues), "Get to what they're really saying."  Of couse this is hard - very hard.  But God will give you the perception.  We have to release a little, and realize that our first "right' thought might need a second thought.  :)

I affirm Suzanne's suggestion of taking them privately to the side of the room for a short discussion.  They have a need to "win" in front of peers that is stronger than a 50-foot-high hurricane!

I agree about "losing" the candy - it often feeds the food-weight-health issues so common today.  Things that demonstrate "music has it own rewards" are preferable - generally to the students as well.  One reward my students generally worked for;  if they did fairly well (define what constitutes "well" and print it out/put on board) I let them have an "American Idol" activity on Friday.  (It actually came about accidentally; on a testing day we were missing several, so I said, "We'll have a Master Voice Class - take turns getting up, and share an "Awareness without Judgement" positive critique.  They thought it was like American Idol - and asked for it the next week.  Anyone who makes excessively negative, hurtful, or silly comments loses their turn to vote/participate.  They can have an "alternative assignment" (the most boring thing you can think up - like re-write, in their own words, 10 pages of the old text in your back room...)

I hear your stress and concern about concert deadlines.  Time pressure might be having a negative effect.  Several of my concerts only had 3 or 4  relatively-easy songs ...that's ok .  As others have posted, the trust/relational issues need addressing now.  Add some concert time by inviting talented friends as guest musicians from the community - some "from their culture."...maybe some from yours.  Audition some Honor students/Beta club officers to do small group/solos - they might prove to be good leaders in your classes next year!  (My choir turned around when I realized I needed some dedicated students to balance the "can't care" - and at least one counselor supported that.) It is common , now, to include learning demonstrations, and sing-alongs in a concert.  Parents will get a clue what you are about.    After a few weeks and continued soul-searching, Godspeed your career; we all respect and understand whatever decision(s) you make.  Just know that, sometimes, there are happy endings:  (This organization is working - very successfully - in one of the same neighborhoods addressed by Street Grace.)  http://www.beltlinebikeshop.org/about